Saturday, January 31, 2009

Overflow

I would not say I am a good steward of my time. The perfect demonstration of it is me, sitting here blogging about it instead of sleeping. I have so much to do, and yet so little time to fit it all in. I think this is because I am not a natural planner. Sure, I am straight-jacketed by our societies love for planning (maybe you feel the same?)- but it's not my preference! I love setting up dinner or coffee dates here and there, but ultimately, I love not knowing what I'm gonna do. I enjoy spontaneity, and the older I get, the less there seems to be.
I know I'm not the only person that feels this way, we all have insanely busy lives. I enjoy the things I do for the most part (math class, not so much), it just feels like every second is crammed with something.
I feel bad about this too because it often means nothing gets my full energy or attention. I've come to find that spreading myself so thin has covered a lot of areas, but leaves me pretty exhausted. I try to cover all my bases, and keep everyone satisfied with what I have to offer.
The thing that has become ineffective in this is that an empty pitcher can't keep pouring out water. I've dedicated to so much and so many people, I'm not spending enough time with the One who can give endlessly to me! Not only is He my Savior, Lord and Friend, He is (quite literally) my life giver! The One who can fill me up with the energy and love to overflow into my day.
"The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart." -Luke 6:45.
Lately, I have been trying too hard to juggle everything in my life, without first asking God to fill me up with His love, His ability, His power. So the overflow of my heart has been frustration, irritability and exhaustion. Instead of spending my time with Jesus and allowing Him to show me where He wants me, I've been busy making my own plans of how well I can serve everyone else.
Constantly, we plow through our routines without a thought or a prayer. It's not easy, but I've been cutting back on my commitments. I've been asking God where He wants me, not where I think I should be. Praying about what I do to serve Him, not what can I do to please others. Taking the time to ask God to fill me up, so I'm not trying to do everything alone, but through the power of His Spirit.

1 comment:

Hey Lady Lauren said...

I was just thinking of how nice it would be if you had a blog! I am trying to get mine off the ground too :)